Being a spouse can be difficult.
Being a parent can be hard.
Finding balance in family life and doing your best to get it right is rough and takes mountains of patience.
Even trickier than all of that is trying to pull it off in a blended family.
I tried to look up statistics on blended families and it became overwhelming. What it boils down to is that about 50 percent of American families are blended, meaning the adults in the family have children from previous relationships.
My family is blended. Well, my family is chopped, minced, and then blended. Even though we donât use the terms step or half, the reality is that we have step parents, step kids, step siblings, half siblings and we even have my sister who weâre raising as our daughter.
Weâre the poster family for blended families.
Being a blended family is tough work. You donât just have to figure out how to make life inside your home work, you also have to figure out a way to make life between two or more homes work. Navigating co-parenting with another family is not for the faint of heart and is another post all together.
Iâd like to say we get it right all the time and that love always trumps the hard times but Iâd be lying.
Iâd like to say grace is always given when we tread on bumpy terrain but Iâd be lying.
Iâd like to say that we never doubt the choices weâve made but sometimes none of our choice make any sense at all and I wonder how the heck we got here in the first place.
Blending families takes more than most of us are equipped with and because of that the failure rate is through the roof.
The brutal reality of it all is that your blended family is going to fail and over and over again youâll fail at trying to make it work.
Youâll fail at never having feelings of resentment.
Youâll fail at swallowing your pride.
Youâll fail at relinquishing some control and allowing another person discipline your child.
Youâll fail at showing compassion and grace.
Youâll fail at keeping jealousy under wraps.
Your family will fail at not being territorial inside your own home.
Your family will fail at making love completely equal between all its members.
Your family will fail at pretending itâs easy.
Your family will fail at wanting to make it work.
But through all the rough spots youâll find immense beauty.
There will be the moments where the light shines through the cracks.
There will be the moments when the broken pieces will come together to make a stained glass window where others will look through and see nothing but beauty. Theyâll see all the different colors, shapes and sizes and stare in awe at how it all came together so perfectly.
There will be the times when you watch your spouse love on and parent your child as their own and it will bring up a love so deep you canât even imagine how it contains itself inside your heart.
There will be a time when your spouseâs child kisses you and tells you that they love you and youâll wonder how you ever lived your life without them.
There will be times when your children walk hand in hand with your spouseâs children and youâll know that you are teaching them to love far beyond any boundaries.
Your blending family is going to fail.
Theyâre going to fail over and over but theyâre also going to prove that love and grace can outshine any darkness.
Theyâre going to show others how broken things can be mended, maybe not back to the way they were but to a way that lets the light shine through the cracks and heal the hurts.
How We Can Help
If you, a friend or a family member find themselves in a situation such as this, please call the Law Office of Scott A. Ferris, P.A. at 305 670-3330 right away. Scott A. Ferris, Esq. is a licensed criminal defense attorney who has been practicing law since 1987. He is available whenever you need him to pursue your rights. Please learn about our firm at www.FerrisLawFirm.com.
Republished by the Law Office of Scott A. Ferris, P.A.